August 12, 2013: “Expecting”

Today is Lucy’s 6th birthday, and we read her baby book tonight instead of a regular book. I’m feeling nostalgic, so I’m sharing the poem I wrote for Lucy before she was born.  I told Lucy that we give her presents on her birthday because she gave me the best present on her birth day.  She made me a mom.


My dearest baby
My as of yet unnamed but already loved baby
My Lucy, my Logan, my Korvin, my Leyna
My any of the other much discussed and debated names

I do not know you, I’ve never met you
I’ve never seen your face
but I already cherish your downy eyebrows (which will never ruffle)
that cover your chocolate-brown or maybe fiery-green eyes

I can already smell your sweet scent
and know that I’ll be breathing shallow breaths whenever I’m near you
to protect you from my invasive and corrosive germs.
I may have to pick up some masks from the hospital.

We are going to laugh so much!
I will read to you and we will laugh
and we will swing and you will laugh.
Your dad and I will tell you we love you. And you will laugh. But it’s true.

I didn’t even know that I was waiting for this.
For you.
But I realize now that on my pathway
I was planning, and waiting, and sacrificing for you.

You will bring me joy, and pain.
I will add you in to every moment.
I will calm your tears, and covet your respect
and smooth your eyebrows to show you I understand.

You won’t remember the first days
But I will never forget them.
They will be chaos and crippling tenderness
and I will know my place.

It will be at your cradle side
barely breathing
touching your soft eyebrows as tears roll down my face.
I love you, my child.

~Emma Kucera~
It has my nose!  27 weeks 2

Photo by Jeni Valdez - paperview
Photo by Jeni Valdez – paperview
Photo by Jeni Valdez - paperview
Photo by Jeni Valdez – paperview

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